I Would Have Done A Few Things Differently
by OhSoDeadly
Summary: Captain Malcolm Reynolds, a name that rolls off the tongue. A name that commands respect and even fear from those that know it. A name that just plain commands. But Zoe is curious: what if things had gone a little differently? One-shot, Mal/Inara hints.


There hadn't been much in the way of precedent.

It had been a plain regular day (night, whatever tickled your fancy) onboard, as Wash steered 'em towards their next port of call, or at least, took some valued time away from his dinosaurs so as to not let 'em crash into the nearest moon, or passing trade ship, or anything else might cross their way. Most of the crew were about at their duties, with the exception of Jayne who'd found himself a terribly inconvenient nap spot at the foot of the stairs in the cargo bay. He himself had been doing nothing of real consequence, checking some inventory they might be able to trade when they made port at Blackburn Cove, when without warning Zoe came, stuck her head round a crate and said, "Sir, I've got a question."

He grimaced, stuck his head out of the "goods hole", as he'd come to name it, and wiped his hands on his coat. He'd forgotten to take it off after they'd come back aboard, which struck him as a mite silly, but damn if he was heading back to his dorm now. Work to be done and so forth, even if he did have captain-y privileges. "Something troubling you, Zoe? Don't tell me Jayne tried to take command again in my absence." Still, he'd rather that than him pull somethin' like that _tze sah ju yi_ he'd conjured on Ariel...He put it out of his head. Jayne had atoned, more or less.

His first mate flashed a thin smile, cast a scornful look at the snoring, dribbling...what had Simon called him back in Canton? 'Ape-man-gone-wrong.' Huh. Wouldn't have seemed likely the doc was all that capable of clever insults. "Don't seem like Jayne's up to much of anything at present, cap'n. No, just a hypothetical that's been running round my head."

"And that is?" It was getting ruttin' hot in here, damn coat sticking to him like a second skin. He wanted to cool off, but there was still work to be done, so he sat down on a box of somethin' and wiped his forehead.

"You ever wonder what it'd be like if I were cap'n instead of you?"

Well now. You didn't hear that every day.

He rose his head, narrowed his eyes. "Can't say it's come up in my thoughts, Zoe. Being first mate not exciting enough for you? You remember what happened last time we started puttin' crew out of their place-"

He stopped there, not because he was too sore to go near the subject, but 'cause of the flash of pain that showed up on her face, just for a second. Might've been nearly six months since they'd put paid to that _go neong yung duh _Niska and left his skyplex in a shambles, but the wounds were still raw and would be long in the healing. He himself was fine, new ear and all, but Wash still had nightmares, and the doc was still medicating him. Their pilot was still quick with a joke and a laugh, but he weren't the same person he'd been.

Zoe had carried it stoically, as always. But there was sadness, now, behind that face.

Deciding to steer clear, he asked wryly, "Thinking you could do it better, Mrs Washburne? Seems things have been running just fine on this boat with me at the helm."

She laughed at that, that laugh that told him she was thinkin' of some good examples of when his captaining skills were less than adequate, and sat down alongside him. "Firstly, it's my man who's at the helm, not you, sir. And come to that, that raises a valid point. What kind of a captain doesn't pilot his own ship?"

He raised his hands defensively. "Hey now, I'm the captain for a reason! I've got to make sure everything's shipshape! Wasn't for me, poor Serenity'd be half wrecked, and the other half'd be Jayne's kingdom or some _go se_ like that-"

Zoe was grinning now, an evil damned grin at that. "Not so, cap'n. Hell, so long as we had Wash to fly and Kaylee to keep her together, we'd be just fine. You're kinda starting to third wheel here, sir."

He gaped, flapped his hands around like a gull in a gale, at a loss for words. Why the little-"Now, see here, it's only 'cause of me that those two even stand as crew on this boat-"

"Wash wouldn't leave. Little thing called true love. And as for Kaylee, well, for all that she's crushing on the good doctor, her real true love is Serenity. Not some grumpy old cuss of a Browncoat. With respect, sir."

He shook a warning finger. "Mind yourself now, _bu hui hen de puo fu_. So maybe you're right about a few things, but what makes you think you'd be a better captain than me?"

She stood up, began to pace, and ticked things off on her fingers. "Let's see now, firstly, I'd have replaced that crappy compression coil before we went bust and nearly died-"

"Hey, we _both _nearly died there! And that wasn't fun at all. I got shot, remember?" He pulled up his shirt and pointed vehemently at a patch of skin. "'Sides, it all worked out fine, didn't it?"

"I would have maybe listened to Kaylee in the first place, 'stead of waiting for things to go bad. Would've saved you a run-in with scavengers and a bump on my head, now wouldn't it?" She folded her arms, eyeing him beadily. He was caught there. But that didn't mean he couldn't defend himself from these outrageous accusations. So he grated out, "We couldn't afford a new-"

"And then, "she said smugly, "there was our Mrs Reynolds. Sweet Saffron. I would have dropped her right back on Triumph, but seemed you liked having your own pet wench to cook and wash your feet-"

"I didn't-she didn't-_there wasn't any foot washing! _And that gorram hussy played us all like fools, went near as seducing Inara, you might recall-"

Zoe laughed, as if she'd never heard such _xiongmao niao _in her life. "Right, and I suppose she just fell'n hit her head too?"

He stopped at that, still at a loss for words, but now for an altogether different reason. He'd all but dismissed that odd incident-assuming she and Saffron _had _kissed after all. And truth be told, he'd come near to "being in his bunk" just entertaining the notion. But rather than keep bringing it up, he'd just let it be, an occasional smirk directed as they passed each other on the ship being the only evidence that he still thought about it now and then.

Now what in the name of _shun sheng duh gao wahn _was Zoe talking about? Surely not...no, of course not. A more lack-brained idea'd be hard to find. After all, the both of them were pretty clear as to where they stood. A strictly business relationship, she'd said, and so it was. Too much of a space 'tween them, anyhow. She was a Companion, used to the fancy life a Core world could offer, and as for him...well. Born and bred a frontier boy on Shadow and that was the way he liked it. The Alliance was all over life that wasn't on a Rim world, and he wouldn't-couldn't-stand for that.

Not after Serenity Valley, anyhow.

But Inara wasn't the Alliance, and wasn't some faceless government of fascists trying to make his life as hard as they could possibly make it. OK, maybe that weren't quite fact (she spun him about sometimes, made it hard to get a grip), but all common sense and reason said one person couldn't have such an effect on him.

Then why did his heart race every time she walked on by? Why did he feel the slightest twinge of guilt every time he walked into her shuttle uninvited, quickly paved smooth by sarcasm and banter? Why did he feel a part of him scream and claw everytime they came to blows and he stated, face like stone, that this _wasn't her business _and she was _free to leave as soon as she damn well pleased_?

Not a bit of it made sense. Nor was it something he was interested in thinking about.

Suddenly realising Zoe was expecting an answer, he shrugged and smiled coyly, like he saw Kaylee do sometimes when she was trying to throw the doc for a loop, and said, "Well now, Zoe, might be I know somethin' you don't. A captain's got to have secrets, you know?"

She rolled her eyes. "Right. You know something we don't. Aye aye, sir." Making a mock salute, she made for the stairs.

He watched her leave, mulling it over. Maybe he was better off just letting things lie. Maybe he was catching emotions off River again, or somesuch. Maybe he was starting to lose his "feared and respected captain" angle he'd been trying to build up. Maybe-

Ah, hell with it. "Hey, Zoe."

She stopped, turned. "Sir?"

He put his hands on his hips, faced her. "You'd make a damn good captain. Anyone knows that, and if they'd say otherwise I'd give 'em a few bruises to change their minds."

Weren't sure if it was all an act, or if she was just feeling good 'cause Wash had been working some of his marital magic, but she smiled an honest-to-goodness smile at him, and said, "Thanks, Mal." She started up the stairs, giving Jayne a light kick as she did so. The cargo bay echoed with the surprised and furious shouts of their resident merc. He laughed, and so did Zoe. Gave him a good feeling to hear that sound again. It had been all too long.

Crap, now he was just starting to sound all soft...not to worry. Findin' and chewin' out the doc'd do him a world of good.

Drawing in a slobbery breath, and muttering curse words under his breath, Jayne stumbled over to him, rubbing his eyes. "''Ey, now what the hell was that all about? What'd ah miss?"

Mal shrugged, went back to his work. "Nothing you'd be interested in, Jayne. Nothing at all."

_**tze sah ju yi: **_Suicidal idea_****_

go neong yung duh: Son of a bitch_****_

bu hui hen de puo fu: Remorseless harridan****

_**xiongmao niao: **_Panda urine_****_

shun sheng duh gao wahn:Holy testicle Tuesday


End file.
